I’M TOO FUCKING TIRED! I just want to sleep. My entire fucking body aches and i have a manual labor job that does not help. I have sciatica(at the moment) and don’t bitch about it….until this week. No more medication. Oh yeah, this week it’s going doooowwwwwwnnnn. I’m sick of medicine! Goodnight:)
You know, “The heat of the moment”, thats what i’ve always heard but never REALLY understood until recently. I always get upset or frustrated when things dont work out as planned but theres no point in getting crazy to the point to where it screws up a day or even weekend, shit even months. Life is like a loooong ride. Yeah it seems to get shorter and shorter as the days go on, but only because we’re not appreciating every little moment. Take a step back and just think “Will i feel this way a week from now?”, “Will i feel this way tomorrow?” I know its different for every one and every situtation but from my experiences, Its not worth the trouble and effort to stay mad or frustrated. Learn from your mistakes, theres a reason you’ve been hearing phrases like that all your life, Its because thery’re damn TRUE! One example i can give is i worked really hard lately to save alot of money to move into a new apartment. I’ve been sitting on this money for a while now, and now that i bought this new car, and someone elses headache, I literally have to wipe ALL of my bank accounts to pay for this, and to top it alll off NOTHING has been fixed on my car. You know, of course its a big headache and leaves me SPIT broke, but i know a week, or month from now i know i will not care because money will always be flowing in, and i will have a damn good story to tell haha. and some good advice for the next dumbass i see doing the same thing i did.
I need to take a step back and stop jumping the gun all the time. I have this problem where I either need options or control. This causes about 90% of my problems, and with the two mixed….disastrous to myself. I just want the best for myself and others. I have goals, I have plans, just waiting to happen. I’m finally ready to go ahead and go through with them, but there’s ALWAYS something preventing me from achieving them. As of now, I’m playing the waiting game. But rest assured once I get the first opportunity, I’m fucking taking it.
Where I have absolutely nothing to do, all I would like to do is SLEEP THE FUCK IN! But my sleeping in is 7am:/ what a bummer haha. What the hell am I going to do for the next 15+ hours!!??? Nooo idea.
Drunk. Ignorant. 0 fucks givin. Broke now. Shit night. Over analyzing. You can do the rest, im over it. Night.
This shit is getting ridiculous!!! I’m only working less than part time, even though I’m a “Full Time” worker, and have been for 3+ years. Should I look for a new job? Ride this one out? I just don’t know. Oh man, if I had the attention span to stay on here and write, I would, but I don’t. Bye. Haha.
Was very productive!:) I always procrastinate on the smallest things, and it leaves a little bit of stress in me, which builds up and blah blah blah. So today I slammed out all of those little things, and made a game plan for the future. Shits turning out the way I want!…for the most part. Well. Just got home. Time to smoke some of this new medical and play some call of duty. Almost perfect:)
Finally get some time off to just relax and do nothing! I mean I always have time off but im still worrying about financial situations, work, the house blah blah blah. In less than a month I’ll be able to kick back by the pool and drink a legal beer with my mom in Arizona. Haha. I’ve been waiting for that basically all my life! I grew up going to Havasu and I’ve always wanted to get drunk with her there, and now I finally can! The last time I went blew asshole. This should be more chill. Gotta get back to work!
I finally took out my spacer on my truck! It’s been giving me problems haha. It wasn’t hard but I’ve been lagging to the max. But its good because that’s just going to cause a ripple effect on me to get more shit done! I love the accomplished feeling. So now i’m going through all my shit and throwing away what I don’t need and selling the rest. Makin moves:)
I almost went insane today. Work is driving me FUCKING NUTS! It’s so unorganized. It’s held me back on many things. But then I stop and think, maybe it’s for the better. I just need to stop being hot headed and wait to see what happens. Everything should fall in place around the end of February or March. Who knows. I’ve been waiting for this raise since last year. The CEO himself asked about the situation and never followed through. Guess i’ll wait and see. On another note. I miss you.